Twilight That Could Be Dawn

The collapse of liberalism

In 2016, Trump enthusiasts took over the GodlikeProductions.com message board. The mood turned grim, much as it had fifteen years earlier, when Fortuyn fans flooded the IEX message board. This time, I stayed as I had missed something important. Given my possible future job, and my supposedly being Adolf Hitler reincarnated, not comprehending fascism was no excuse, so I familiarised myself with the MAGA crowd. Hanging out with people helps you to understand them. And it served as a reality check. God’s plan for the New World Order seems to turn the world into one happy family, a global multicultural society. So, one people, one nation, and one leader. It is where fascism comes in. So what stands in the way of peace and happiness? The former Dutch prime minister Jan Peter Balkenende offered a suggestion: norms and values. That answer fell short. We also identify with groups. Our identities stand in the way of becoming one people.

If you hope that MAGA people are misogynistic, hateful of LGBTQ people, and racist, you will not be disappointed if you visit Godlikeproductions.com. Maybe that makes you feel superior, but we all play our part in the human race’s failure. I also followed the feed of r/BlackPeopleofReddit, which features stories and footage of MAGA people harassing blacks or scoulding them with racist slurs. Racism is widespread, but it is not why fascism is seeing a revival. Some hope for a race war to kick out all non-white people. Yet, most fascists worry about crime, fear the future, and want migration to stop. As MAGA enthusiasts point out, the violent crime rate among blacks in the United States is six times as high as among whites. Some immigrant groups in Europe are in the same league. Yet, most immigrants and blacks aren’t violent criminals and have jobs. So, should good people suffer for the deeds of bad ones?

Shared values and norms, and their enforcement, are the principal requirements for a good society. What truly makes a society good is social trust, which allows you to trust strangers and the government. Yet, there is more. The foundation of our societies, from where the authority comes, is myths such as religions or tales about the founding fathers. We fight over these myths because we don’t all believe in the same myths. Last but not least, we are staring into the abyss because Western culture itself is suicidal. It is the problem that led to the other problems. The pursuit of money ruins its moral foundation, turns Earth into a wasteland and promotes a rat race that will terminate humanity. And it drives migration. Also, on the GodlikeProductions.com message board, I was cautious about expressing my opinions. I wasn’t quick to judge. God wrote the script.

Turning humanity into a happy family will require unorthodox methods of an unimaginable kind. Yet that seems to be what the Kingdom of God is about. Even though it seems impossible, if God wants it to happen, it will. The multicultural societies in the West have progressed the furthest socially. The problems we are seeing could be a learning experience for the future. Yet, Paradise will never come from the interplay of social and political forces. It must be an act of God. Humans are a failed species, or to frame it as Christians would, sinners not worthy of God’s grace, and in need of a messiah. GodlikeProductions.com could ban you for no reason, only to let you back in later. It made me use Reddit as well, where you can hang out with other groups, like a fly on the wall.

Flies on walls like Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel can arrive at profound insights. Hegel had figured out how God’s plan would unfold over the next 200 years as a struggle between ideas, leading to social progress. Hegel observed what happened around him, looked back at history, and reasoned from there. It appears that social progress has come to an end, and it may be up to us to figure out what to do next. We are facing a mass extinction event, which makes our fights look like a brawl on the deck of the sinking Titanic. The idea of social progress developed in the West under pressure from social justice activists, and it seems central to God’s plan. Yet we are running into the limits of human nature and would gain more by bringing the rest of the world up to that same standard. So, having a quota for women in management is of lesser importance than ending child brides. The first Trump presidency was not a clean break with the past, as his cabinet featured several old-order Republican figures. They kept The Donald in check.

The second Trump administration became a different ballgame. Trump went unhinged after he had surrounded himself with sycophants. His erratic and spiteful caprices became a spectacle so hilarious that even Monty Python couldn’t have made it up, with Trump naming buildings after himself, declaring his birthday a public holiday, going after his opponents in the most unclassy fashion while claiming they lacked class, and numerous other self-aggrandising acts. It was hard to see a plan behind his actions, so he must be a genius playing five-dimensional chess, his cult claimed, and if you don’t see it that way, you suffer from a terrible affliction called Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS). His economic policies included raising tariffs on Swiss imports because he didn’t like how the Swiss leader spoke to him. Then there were his brazen lies, his self-enrichment and that of his family members by abusing his office, eclipsing all previous corruption by US presidents, his pardoning of criminals, and his divisive Christmas message.

Also noteworthy were Trump’s war threats against Denmark, for, among other reasons, not receiving the Nobel Peace Prize, which he blamed on Norway. Then he went to war with Iran while negotiations were still ongoing for enriching uranium after he had torpedoed the previous nuclear agreement with Iran because Barack Obama signed it, and Bibi Netanyahu told him it was a bad deal for Israel. Later, he agreed to an even worse deal, leaving the rest of the world to pay for the disaster that war caused, including famine due to a lack of fertiliser. Meanwhile, the Trump regime was already eying an attack on Cuba. As a Swedish newspaper put it, ‘This is the problem with having a giant baby in charge of the free world.’

No doubt that the second Trump administration will go down in history as the greatest joke in the history of government as a lasting monument of God’s sense of humour. Many of his followers believe that God sent Donald Trump. And they are right. The name Trump means trumpeteer, and the noise of trumpets would herald the end times. The word ‘trump’ also means to outdo or overcome the competition, which Donald Trump did in politics like few ever did. And the word ‘trumped-up’ refers to the fantasy level of Trump’s statements, in which the connection to reality is often remote at best. And finally, I live in the former Tromp family residence. That name is the Dutch equivalent of Trump. As I may come to replace him, that could be a prophetic coincidence.

By 1 January 2025, it was already clear that the second Trump administration would be very different from the first. Trump had ousted those who might rein him in, so his erratic conduct could destabilise the world, or so I guessed. My preparations were not yet complete but seemed good enough should the time come, and were close to the moment when additional preparation would make little sense, which I estimated to be around 1 April 2027. I further surmised that the job would start before Trump’s second term ended. My new deadline became 1 January 2029. Things will not return to what they were before. The liberal world order has ended. Normally, the end of an order would herald a dark age, but the liberal order was never ideal to begin with. Yet, a poor order is better than none.

Liberal states have long had an edge because of capitalism and science. When the Soviet Union collapsed, liberalism seemed to have won. Yet, it is better to say that our consumption addiction has won. The communists had given up on their project because they had promised their workers more stuff, while everyone knew that workers in capitalist countries had more stuff. The modern consumer is not much unlike a drug addict busy committing suicide by overdosing, wanting his dealer to bring on more. He has no survival skills and is hooked on a system he can’t survive without. The merchants of death, selling us all that merchandise, are like drug dealers selling opioids. Liberalism was yet another fairy tale. It has just collapsed in front of us, but liberals have yet to catch on.

We are at a turning point in history. A crucial pillar of Western civilisation, social progress, is falling apart. Civilisation is just a thin veneer to keep the beast within us in check. Liberalism was an attempt to achieve a good society through a social contract, giving all groups in society a suitable place based on the idea of a fundamental equality of all individuals. That is only possible if we all share these same liberal values and adhere to these same liberal norms. That begins with the myths we believe in. They give our lives meaning, and we derive our values and norms from them. Myths also divide us, so we keep fighting over them. That is not going to end well. And if you think that the ICE deportations are bad, in South Africa, citizen vigilantes are hunting down illegal immigrants. We are at the end of Hegel’s ride. We may either see the end of civilisation or the completion of our journey to Paradise.

Peak bullshit

In the early 2000s, I had a hunch that we would soon see Peak Bullshit, the era when nonsense couldn’t reach higher levels, after seeing that the Internet is an ideal medium to spread misinformation like climate change denial. Social media didn’t exist at the time. Yet bullshit is everywhere and has always been. We need myths to cooperate. We need to agree rather than be right to collaborate effectively. Even in science, there is bullshit, so many people don’t trust science, including climate science, and see it as a hobby for progressives. We can measure temperature and relate it to CO2 levels, so there is little doubt about climate change. Yet, Woke ideology has affected science, either by narrowing the range of subjects open to investigation or the range of acceptable conclusions.

A high-profile case in the Netherlands was Wouter Buikhuisen’s research into the causes of criminal behaviour. Buikhuisen concentrated on biological factors. Could genes affect conduct, and could you identify criminal genes? Leftist opinion makers attacked him, claiming that the modern capitalist society and authoritarian upbringing cause behavioural issues like crime. Buikhuisen had to deal with personal attacks portraying him as dumb and evil, as well as disturbances during his lectures, some of which were violent. Partly due to the upheaval and its effect on Buikhuisen’s private life, the research project eventually faltered. The myths we believe in relate to our political preferences.

The left has long dominated the social sciences because, through science, we might achieve social progress, an idea that appeals to progressives. Humans are programmable but also constrained. Progressives focus on us being programmable, while conservatives focus on the constrained part. Going against human nature does more harm than good, they think. The profit motive also affects research topics and acceptable conclusions. So, can you trust the vaccines Big Pharma profits from? The COVID-19 vaccines weren’t harmless, but they have prevented millions of deaths.

The insanity of the fascists outdoes that of the lunatic left, and that is quite impressive. The spread of vaccine misinformation may have caused 200,000 fatalities in the US alone. And if you read headlines like, ‘The British government can sentence concerned parents for five year to prison for protecting them from the influence of LGBTQ propaganda,’ that probably is in the case they beat them up to rid them of their gay and trans feelings. And not being allowed to beat up your children for such frivolous reasons means that the state owns them, these fascists reason. They think they own their kids and can do with them as they please. With Donald Trump lying more than any politician ever did, to the point that even many of his followers get fed up with it, we may finally have reached Peak Bullshit, and the Day of Truth may be upon us.

Mediocre vision

Humanity’s lack of collective intelligence implies that a single leader with the right vision will do better, provided that this individual has unlimited authority, like a messiah. Jesus said, ‘I am the way, the truth and the life.’ You can save yourself by following me and accepting that what I say is the truth. That makes having the idea of being the messiah an uneasy predicament for any sensible person. What if people believe me, and it turns out that I am crazy? You can’t have that, do you? I have been wrong many times. It made me question my views. Yet, if something goes wrong because of a choice you make, the alternative can still be worse. If the captain had saved the Titanic but made an error that caused 200 fatalities, his actions would still have saved 2,000. Those who disagree with me are morons who are part of the collective suicide cult.

What I write is the truth as I see it. I may have to revise my views, but the truth I present to you may be the truth that saves you. You may find older writings of mine, but insofar as they contradict my current ones, the latter reflect a greater deal of experience-based realism, not a fundamental change of view. God isn’t going to change human nature, or so I gradually came to assume, and human nature is more problematic than I previously thought in my naivety. It also took me fifteen years to realise that I had to become a dictator and endure a leadership cult. That is far worse than my worst nightmare. And so, it took time to accept it and find peace within. Whatever will be, will be. Every perspective is to some degree arbitrary, as is every order. Yet, I must tell you what to think because the collective intelligence of humanity is less than that of a single worm.

Learning history is one thing, but experiencing it is a different ballgame. The Dutch culture of the late 20th and early 21st centuries formed me, just as first-century Jewish culture shaped Jesus. The Netherlands is an agreeable place to live in, a paradise, maybe. Yet, progress comes with drawbacks and losers. Feminism came at the expense of conservative men. If they can, they will reverse women’s rights. You don’t have to doubt it. Conservative men rewrote the Bible to that end. And so, you also don’t have to doubt that the winners write history, or rewrite it, as MAGA tries to do with slavery.

I must rewrite history once again by focusing on the underlying mechanisms and human nature to show that culture is the decisive factor in building an agreeable world society. Of course, I believe I am right, but if you aren’t the winner, you can’t write history, and there is no point in being right. Luckily, might makes right. And as faith can move mountains, we can make the rest of the world a better place. God’s plan seems to be that Europe has been the battleground of ideas, so the Hegelian dialectic has progressed the farthest there, and the outcomes of this grand experiment should guide our future. We face fundamental disagreements about the direction we should take, leading to an authority crisis and a moral crisis. As Judgement Day approaches, it seems no coincidence that the International Court of Justice is in The Hague, the Netherlands.

If the world is to become one society, it will be multicultural. It is an intermediary phase, as cultures will gradually give way to folklore, because we will live by the same standards and myths and know that we share a common destiny. We must find out what the future requires of us, and from there, define acceptable conduct. None of the major cultures currently in existence meets the requirements, so the change will be hard on everyone. Yet cultural differences remain the last obstacle to the unification of humankind. And that can be fixed. The Danes descend from the raping and pillaging Vikings. The Viking raids ended soon after they had become Christians, so beliefs shape cultures.

Only a brutal truth exercise that spares no one can save us now. These are shitty issues, and you can’t fix them without getting your hands dirty. Coming from a family of farmers, I am not afraid of shit. The starting point could be the separation of the good and the evil ones, so the sheep and the goats, so it will be the Day of Judgement. You either fit in God’s Paradise, or you don’t. It doesn’t matter who you are. What matters is what you do. If we care about the world, we can’t have those who don’t care ruin it for us. There is no place for excuses. And you can’t have people believing in other myths because we will fight over them until we are all dead. Those who don’t fit in can’t live among us, and have to go to brainwashing centres to clean up their minds or to prison labour camps to repay their debt to society. Most will probably return to society at some point.

Make America Go Apeshit

A 2013 poll indicated 26% of Americans believed that Barack Obama is the Antichrist or might be.1 Most of these people later voted for Trump. Compared to Obama, Donald Trump is a jackass. No woman has accused Obama of sexual misconduct, nor did his name pop up in the Epstein files. Racism plays a role here, but it is not the entire story. The introduction of public healthcare insurance has infuriated conservatives. Barack Obama once gave the following Easter message, ‘Michelle and I wish you a joyful holiday filled with the enduring power of faith and hope.’ And Donald Trump, ‘Open the fucking strait, you crazy bastards, or you’ll be living in hell. Praise be to Allah.’ Why some think that Obama is an evil genius, and a Muslim, while the Allah-praising Trump is the best choice for Christians, is a mystery for those who don’t comprehend America.

The hatred of progressive presidents has a long history. John F. Kennedy faced the John Birch Society’s Wanted for Treason campaign. The John Birch Society had found that Kennedy was a communist and that communists had infiltrated the highest ranks of the US government and were conspiring to create a totalitarian one-world government. The supposed proof for that was the US administration’s attempt to prevent the spread of John Birch Society propaganda. To American conservatives, the expansion of government or international cooperation like the United Nations smells like communism. These are collectivist organisations. And communists oppose and repress religion, so it is Satan’s work as well, in their view at least. That goes a long way in explaining these sentiments.

If he had them, Kennedy did an excellent job of hiding his communist sympathies. After, like a true puppet of the Military Industrial Complex, having grilled his opponent, Eisenhower, during the election campaign for neglecting America’s defences, making Eisenhower warn of the influence of the Military Industrial Complex at his farewell speech, he risked World War III with the Soviet Union during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Those geniuses at the John Birch Society saw through all that and found Eisenhower to be an even more dangerous radical leftist lunatic extremist. While conspiracy theorists, with their eyeballs glued to their computer screens, were busy analysing every move by every secret society and imagining countless others, the John Birch Society has taken over the United States, with a little help from Russia’s secret services, by making people believe these conspiracy theories. If that was the plot to destroy America, it has succeeded marvellously.

The system is as corrupt as that of France before the revolution of 1789, and it only grew more corrupt until conservatives finally had enough, gathered behind Trump, and threw out the old order Republicans. Now, liberals and conservatives hate each other’s guts. To illustrate the point, on 31 December 2025, someone reposted a RealDonaldTrump social media post on Reddit headlined ‘Windmills are killing all of our beautiful Bald Eagles!’ It featured a photograph of a dead bird, not a bald eagle, near a windmill in Israel, so not the United States. I reacted jokingly, ‘At least, Donald Trump was real.’ These were unmistakably his words, and he posted them as RealDonaldTrump. That was the joke. The post was downvoted. It is impossible to say whether Trump haters or Trump lovers did it, because both groups lack a sense of humour, but something is wrong with those who found it offensive.

Conspiracy thinking is more widespread in the United States than in the Netherlands. Conspiracy theories often relate to the facts, but if you investigate them, much remains unproven, inaccurate or wrong. Conspiracy theorists don’t adhere to strict logic. Pizzagate may be a fabrication, but they claim the Epstein files prove it. If you call conspiracy theories hunches, they make more sense. We don’t know what’s going on, so getting the direction right is already a success. And if you remove the crap, the New World Order conspiracy theory has a lot going for it, as does the belief that Jews run US politics. Worse yet, the conspiracy theorists aren’t paranoid enough by far, as the scheme is much more elaborate than their wildest imaginations. These secret plots are all part of a greater plot that seems to include the ultimate psyop: undermining trust in US society to make America go crazy and ready for the messiah. So, MAGA could stand for ‘Make America Go Apeshit.’

Idealism and realism

A good society is based on social trust, which requires everyone to be trustworthy. There are always people trying to take advantage of others, but when there are few of them, most people keep their end of the bargain, and social trust is high. If you believe that others are as trustworthy as you are, and you are trustworthy, you are willing to contribute to the common good. It also works the other way, so degenerate morals become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Rewards and punishments can help to make people obey the rules and keep the group focused on the common good. It is why we have prisons and fines. As we are nearing an apocalypse, we face a global collective action problem. We can only save ourselves if we do it together. That would normally be impossible because tribalism and money are both stronger than any moral system, except in fairy tales.

Only one of the disciples betrayed Jesus. That already proved fatal. Judas must have witnessed God’s power, if we are to believe the Bible on the matter, yet he betrayed Jesus, either out of patriotism or greed. He may have hoped that Jesus would oust the Romans to establish a Jewish state, and grew disillusioned, or the lure of money proved stronger than his fear of God. And only one Indian patriot sufficed to murder Mahatma Gandhi. Since then, India and Pakistan have been one step away from a great patriotic war with nukes. It is why we may be incredibly lucky to be simulations, with God controlling the script, and thus have a chance of success. Without a script, being a messiah is a losing proposition, with zero chance of success, not worth entertaining for rational individuals.

Muslims are no better than Christians. Money also turns their religion into a hollow custom. Where the oil money flows, the rich flaunt their excessive lifestyles, leaving their less fortunate Muslim brothers to toil in misery. A few might generously donate to religious charities helping the poor or funding nutters who blow up things and murder infidels in the name of God. Yet they are more interested in building the tallest skyscrapers. And Jews? We don’t even have to discuss the Jews. So, what about the Dutch? Yeah, what about whataboutisms? It takes one to know one. So, if economic growth and competition are killing us, then trade and money are the problem.

Not all merchants are evil people. Many are not. It is the system we work in. How to deal with that problem comes next, but solving it begins with identifying the cause. We can’t do without trade and money, so the odds of religion defeating money in a realistic scenario are zero at best, for their corrupting influence is hard to contain. The privileged never have enough. And those who have the money decide what happens, and you need money to make money. Greed will prevail unless brute force ends it. That force must be truly brutal, as even the communists weren’t up to the challenge. And they have tried very hard indeed, and they had an impressive stash of weapons, so you can’t blame them for not trying hard enough. You must be willing to murder billions of people and have the means to do so, like God, to frighten us to the point that we stop listening to the merchants.

As for the question I asked myself as a teenager, ‘Is it possible that communists had good intentions?’ If you know how deep the problem runs, you can only appreciate their effort. If there is no God, as the communists believed, we, the little people, are on our own, against the superior force of money and tribalism, and religion blinds people from these brutal facts, so there is no chance at all that we survive. The elites will play us out by sowing divisions with religious and nationalist fairy tales. They make others toil for them so they get rich without working. It will end in destruction, albeit it will be creative, economists assure us, so that our suicide will go down in memory as a form of concept art.

The elites fund think tanks that tell us fairy tales about individual freedom and make us fear collectivism, so that we will not unite and overturn the order in which they are our masters, and we are their serfs. And we, the gullible people, need myths to believe in. The communists faced that brutal truth and tried to stamp out nationalism and religion. Maybe for that reason, they named their newspapers ‘The Truth’. Only communism doesn’t change human nature, so their economic system performed poorly while a new class society with an elite of party bureaucrats arose.

Moral pragmatism is getting by and hoping that God will save the day. Moral idealism is not waiting for God and trying to create Paradise on Earth. A sizeable group of Christians holds the latter view, but also atheist progressives, ranging from communists to liberals. The cynical view is more prevalent among conservatives. Whether we try to make the world a better place or not, human nature makes the apocalypse a done deal. Humans are a failed species, and only God can save us. As Christianity points out, we are sinners and need a saviour. We must leave our cynicism behind and care about other people and nature, while understanding that everything is interconnected, so our actions affect others and nature, and transgressions that disturb the balance in Paradise are heinous crimes.

Since the Hegelian dialectic is how God sees social progress, and the West has progressed the furthest, the West will lead the way. My reason for focusing on the United States is that Americans are pragmatic, get things done, and are the most eager to receive the messiah. Many are literally begging for the Second Coming, so I am not going to criticise them, as only God can save us, and God wrote the script. Compromising with the old, corrupt order is a dead end. We need a spiritual rebirth, must break away from the system run by merchants and usurers, ground our society in ethical principles, and make humankind live in harmony with nature. Europe will probably be next, and the rest of the world will follow. That is my guess for now. Things hardly ever go the way I foresee. Yet, they go precisely according to God’s plan.

Central planning of every detail doesn’t work. The communists have tried hard enough for us to know that trying harder wouldn’t have helped. And you cannot design a society on assumptions alone. Luckily, history provides plenty of insights. And you have to think abstractly, in terms of systems with parts, properties, and relationships. Experienced software engineers design, build, test, start small to see if it works, correct errors, scale up, and fix bugs until the system operates smoothly. That is, unless changes are required. Then, you have to do it all over again. Small changes can have a dramatic, unexpected impact. It is why the absence of further changes is the single most crucial success factor in this endeavour to build a world society for the coming 1,000 years. Future generations must resist pressures to improve if things were okay to begin with. Things were okay in Eden, and the improvements that followed since then only made matters worse.

Selling versus convincing

US politics is also corrupt because moral corruption in the United States is a cultural issue. In that sense, Americans have the government they deserve, as it reflects the spirit of their nation. America has a tradition of moral pragmatism, in contrast to Europe’s idealism. You convince Europeans, but sell to Americans. The difference is not just in the wording. It reflects a cultural divide. I have heard Brits use the phrase, but in a negative sense, meaning getting scammed. It is more common in the United States, where it has a more neutral meaning of becoming convinced. The United States is a nation of salespeople. Markets have no morals, and the ethic of the merchant is no ethic at all. And salespeople lie as much as politicians or even more. A typical American book is Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People, and its cover claims it is the book you need to succeed.

To have success, you have to be ‘genuinely interested’ in other people, the book tells us, so you can sell to them and get rich. In other words, the ‘genuine interest’ of Americans in you might be fake, and you can check by looking for dollar signs in their eyes. That was what I felt when visiting the United States more often than at home. If a Dutchman shows interest in you, it is genuine, or politeness, so usually not with personal gain in mind. And so, the Dutch may appear to be jerks, as they show less ‘genuine interest’ in you. On message boards, I found Americans to show as much genuine interest in me as the Dutch. Carnegie’s book also tells us that people can’t handle criticism and that we should praise rather than criticise them. That is why this world turns to shit. Telling suicidal morons that they are morons doesn’t make them see the light.

So, if an American likes your argument, he buys it as if it were a product. It is a different idea of truth, and a corrupt one. It sheds some light on why religion and climate change denial are more widespread in the United States than in Western Europe. It is part of the American success story. Money is power, and bullshit sells. We are religious beings who need myths to believe in. The typical American phenomenon, less seen elsewhere, is the confidence man, the snake-oil salesman, the grifter who sells you a dream, or stuff you don’t need, for which you go into debt, and pay interest to the usurers. A bit of corruption greases the wheels of industry. It contributed to America’s success. And the United States is not the most corrupt country. Yet, compared to North-West Europe, it is more corrupt.

You may not buy the science of climate change because you don’t like taking public transport or cutting back on meat. And so, you buy into climate change denial. That makes you morally corrupt, but no problem, you can buy the story that Jesus died for your sins, and believing that will get you into heaven. That Jesus died for our sins is pretty unbelievable, and if you had been honest and truthful, you would have questioned your faith, which Western Europeans do more than Americans. Americans believe something because they want to believe it, not because they think it is the truth. That is how salespeople’s minds work. So when the truth about Santa Claus came out, my sister said, ‘I continue to believe in Santa Claus as long as he brings me presents.’ And she became a saleswoman. It also relates to the religious climate in the United States, which differs from that in Europe, most notably among Protestants.

Moral corruption particularly affects some denominations of Protestantism, such as Evangelicals. Protestantism emerged in response to corruption within the Catholic Church. Protestants take moral integrity seriously and make it a matter of personal responsibility. Catholics merely followed the Church’s lead. Yet, Protestants also take the scriptures seriously. It is why there are so many branches of Protestantism differing on the correct interpretation of the scriptures. It opened the door to a different form of moral corruption. You can find a justification in the Bible for evil deeds if you pick selectively. What the Bible says is right and wrong is not always objectively so. But if you, as an American moral pragmatist, make it a matter of popular sentiment rather than of objective moral reason, as idealists in Europe tend to do, you may end up on the side of evil. Paul condemned homosexual acts in no uncertain terms. We don’t know Jesus’ opinion on this matter, but he said not to judge and that he who is without sin should cast the first stone.

There is no objective moral reason to condemn gays and lesbians or deny them the right to marry. It became a contentious issue for Protestants, who take both scripture and moral conscience seriously. When you follow the scriptures on this matter, you shut down your moral conscience, which makes you evil. And if only faith can save you, you don’t have to do good works to compensate for your misdeeds, so you can be evil and still be saved. That is a nice package that you can sell. Who does not wish for a free pass into heaven? Catholics merely followed the Church’s lead, and Catholics must do good works to compensate for their sins. That, at least, was not pure evil.

This morally corrupt Protestantism also existed, but didn’t prevail in North-West Europe. Many of the least corrupt countries are there, while LGBTQ rights in these countries remain uncontested. Meanwhile, Catholic priests lived the good life, which the Dutch call ‘het Roomse leven’ or the Burgundian lifestyle. Jews, as Karl Marx observed, are amoral merchants, and this, rather than racism or religious bigotry, stands at the root of today’s anti-Semitism. Jews are often the merchants and usurers who buy the American politicians. It makes the moral corruption in the United States a sensitive issue, most notably because anti-Semitism has led to the Holocaust. This particular account also demonstrates the ubiquitous nature of culture in our conduct and that the harm we do to each other is often a cultural phenomenon. Now we are at the bottom of the manure pit.

The appetiser Donald Trump

I have been incredibly fortunate to have lived a peaceful, prosperous life in Western Europe during its most agreeable era. For most of my life, I have barely realised it. The situation you live in looks normal to you. It is not. Living in post-war Western Europe is like winning the lottery jackpot of history and geography. The welfare states of post-war Western Europe have been among the brightest spots in an otherwise bleak history of humankind. I wish that everyone could live a life like that, but you can’t have a paradise if not all the right things are in place. They hardly ever are. Barring a miracle, things aren’t going to stay pretty. The European paradise is fading due to war, resource shortages, environmental degradation, political instability, migration, and technological change.

Paradises don’t last. Due to competition, we live in a ‘dynamic environment.’ Competition is a destructive force, even though a creative one, as economists assure us. Donald Trump recognised that. Tariffs are a measure to reduce competition. The Soviet bloc survived because it had irredeemable currencies, hampering trade with the rest of the world. Had they chosen to do so, the Soviets could still be there, mired in stagnation, as North Korea still is. If the United States continues on that path, it will become more like the Soviet Union. Yet, if we don’t halt the competition, we need artificial intelligence to keep up with our rivals, and humans may soon become useless.

For an engineer, there are systems, relationships, variables, inputs, outputs, actions, their consequences, humans with properties, groups with properties, how they interact, and where all that leads. We are cogs in a system, doing our acts, not unique, wonderful, deserving individuals, as many people would like to think. If we were, we would all have been like Mahatma Gandhi, and humanity would have done fine. Gandhi was truly one of a kind. My ethical standards do not come close to his. And I should be your saviour? Yet, as an engineer with far more data at my disposal, I confidently claim that the system will lead us to our destruction. What would otherwise be the point of being a messiah? For me, unlimited authority would be a tool in the engineer’s toolbox, nothing more, nothing less.

Being like Jesus is not enough to succeed. Mahatma Gandhi might have been even more morally pure. Gandhi did what he did purely because he believed it was right. Jesus did what he did because, like me, he was in love and saw no way out. God suggested that I was also Adolf Hitler reincarnated. You can’t fix the world’s problems if you don’t have the guts to do whatever it takes, as Hitler had. Jokes helped deal with that inconvenient truth, such as imagining coming on stage after an introduction by a lady in tight stockings and a hairdo like Helga from the comedy series Allo Allo, who would raise her hand to give the Hitler salute and scream, ‘Our Great Leader!’ Then, I would come up and say, ‘Oh, it’s me. Shame and scandal in the family.’ My mother wasn’t my mother, and she didn’t know.

Donald Trump hurts people’s feelings, but you may soon forget that Donald Trump was such a jerk. You are a bunch of delusional morons busy committing suicide, and I must tell you that. I have worked on a concept plan for the future of humankind that may last for 1,000 years. Such a plan can only lack in detail, but it must set out how to address the most relevant issues we face. The plan is a scary jump into the unknown, also for me, but not making that jump comes with a near-certain fatal outcome. I don’t think that God is on my side. Jesus made that mistake. I play the role I am supposed to play, thinking that failure is worse than death. As the Dutch say, ‘Death or the gladiolas.’ Success or death.

Donald Trump has acted as if he were above the law. A messiah must be above the law. The joke is on me as it would be a l’état-c’est-moi situation, a term that the bureaucrats at my secondary school coined a long time ago, or as the former Dutch minister of immigration, Marjolein Faber, once put it, ‘I am policy.’ A messiah has the divine right of kings, or as the Chinese would say, the mandate of heaven. That is an absolute rule no one should question. It can provide political stability that enabled the Chinese to administer a vast empire and survive as a nation for over 2,000 years. That would require a stable situation, as change will upset the balance. A strong state made that possible. Europe became dynamic because there were no strong states in the Middle Ages, so merchants could take over. That is why we are facing the apocalypse.

Kicking off a revolution

Many, perhaps most, US politicians are corrupt, but Donald Trump tops them all, even though, unlike ordinary politicians who accept bribes to finance their campaigns, he and his entourage exploit the office for personal gain.2 There appears to be insider trading preceding Trump’s social media posts.3 So much for draining the swamp and ridding US politics of corruption. By his own admission, Trump is a pussy grabber who would ‘do’ his daughter had she not been his daughter. At least 26 women have accused him of sexual misconduct.4 Dutch television once aired a fragment, probably because it was hilarious, of a preacher standing in front of Donald Trump, with Trump putting up his best sanctimonious face. The preacher thanked Trump for ‘saving America from Satan.’ Then my wife, Ingrid, said, ‘Look! There you have him! That’s Satan!’ She meant Donald Trump. She was joking, but that can only be funny if there is some truth to it.

My wife doesn’t dislike Trump as I do, and tends to look on the bright side of what he is doing, and forcing Ukraine to accept a bad deal? That’s fine with her if it ends the war. Taking out Maduro? Things were bad in Venezuela already. He ended the Gaza war, sort of, at least. Invading Greenland? She didn’t express an opinion. Bombing Iran back to the Stone Age? They shouldn’t have a nuclear bomb. My wife’s feelings didn’t form that opinion. At the very least, the orange madman is impulsive, vindictive and unwilling to listen to others. When I later recalled the moment, my wife said the preacher had said ‘Antichrist’ rather than ‘Satan.’ His lambasting of the pope’s peace efforts, while portraying himself as Jesus, and the religious display by Donald Trump and his inner circle in the Oval Office, give him a strong shot at the title of Antichrist, who is just a boogeyman, only mentioned in John’s first epistle. And so, you shouldn’t make too much of it.

Trump being a jerk is why people voted for him. When order falls apart, we revert to gangsterism and choose gangsters as our leaders. As a result, the Trump gangster regime and MAGA have become the world’s first and foremost problem and the gravest threat to world peace. The US regime threatened to attack Denmark to secure security guarantees it already had, tore up a deal with Iran, and started a war with Iran to acquire a worse deal, while leaving the rest of the world without oil and fertiliser, thereby triggering possible famines. The regime’s next war could be against Cuba after the corporate Supreme Court ruled that Exxon should receive damages for the Cuban nationalisation of its assets. That ruling means corporations run the world, not governments, and that the US regime can attack Cuba, make the Cubans borrow to pay off Exxon and pay interest to the usurers forever. Also, not particularly helpful is the US regime’s stance on climate change, which is wrecking the planet as we speak.

And so, the United States has lost its right to exist as an independent nation. If the messiah comes, he will put an end to the nations and their leaders, so that is to be expected. Donald Trump should face trial in the International Court of Justice in The Hague, Netherlands. The United States can’t give him a fair trial. Liberals may want to hang him, while conservatives might want to give him a pass. Whether trying to overthrow a legitimate election result constitutes treason may remain a matter of contention but that Donald Trump and his pal Bibi Netanyahu violated international law and committed crimes against humanity by starting the Iran war cannot be in doubt, as the world’s ultimate expert on murders committed in cynical violation of all norms of human morality and international law, Vladimir Putin, called the assassination of Ayatollah Khamenei a murder committed in cynical violation of all norms of human morality and international law.

On 15 May 2025, precisely 8647 days after 11 September 2001, former FBI director James Comey posted a photo of seashells on social media spelling ‘8647’, a code for removing Trump from office. That drew the ire of the Trump regime after the MAGA movement had previously sold hats with ‘8646’ on them, calling for Biden’s removal from office. The Trump regime now considers writing the number 8647 an act of terrorism. There is no evidence suggesting that Comey intended that 8647-day interval, but he could have. Yet, the incident is also part of the 11 September 2001 coincidence scheme, which is beyond the capabilities of human conspirators to organise.

I hadn’t thought about how to oust Trump, but God, in Her great and eternal wisdom, provided me with an idea. In April 2025, I dreamed of being part of a crowd in The Hague during the NATO summit scheduled for that summer. The leaders of the NATO member states were all there. When Trump passed by in his car, I began to scold him in Dutch, ‘Hij is een hondenlul (He is a dog dick).’ It is an offensive slur that football fans sing when disagreeing with the referee’s decision. For a moment, there was absolute silence. Bystanders were shocked, making me fear that the police would round me up. But then the crowd joined in, and the singing grew louder until it became a thundering chant. It made the news worldwide, and in every football stadium, it became the chant. From then on, no one called him President Trump anymore. Everyone called him dog dick.

Play time is over. Adults should run the world. If I am Adam reincarnated, I am 6,000 years old. There may be no one else left to save you. If you are a suicidal moron, you probably do not like my message and my plans. So, let me be very clear. I don’t need you. You need me. If you don’t want me to be your leader, that’s fine with me. I never wished to become the overseer of the lunatic asylum called humanity. And if you succeed in murdering me, it will be your problem, not mine. You will have to live with it, even though that may not be for long, but then you may be lucky if you are among the dead. I don’t know, but if I am the messiah, that is plausible. So maybe you can grow up, leave your infantile beliefs behind, and sing along with the opening chant of the End Times, ‘Donald is a dog dick’.

Latest revision: 3 July 2026

Featured image: AI-generated

1. One in four Americans think Obama may be the Antichrist, survey says. The Guardian (2013).
2. The Corruption Chronicles: Donald Trump’s profiteering from public service, by the numbers. Kei Chin, Michael Beckel, and Oliver Ni (2025). Issue One.
3. The insider trading suspicions looming over Trump’s presidency. Nick Marsh (2026). BBC.
4. The 26 women who have accused Trump of sexual misconduct. Eliza Relman and Azmi Haroun (2017). Business Insider.

The Grades

Unemployment in the early 1980s was high, especially among young people. I had asked my mother, ‘What is the point of studying for unemployment?’ She stressed that there would always be room for the best. They had lived in poverty and had learned that you must work hard to earn your place under the sun. I never experienced poverty, but my parents kept reminding me that you shouldn’t take a comfortable life for granted. It made me work hard, possibly harder than everyone else. It was a conservative Protestant school, so that says something. In primary school, I didn’t see the point of working hard.

Occasionally, I knew more than my teachers. My father later told me about a mayor he knew. He had been my history teacher before he became a politician for the Christian Democrats. He told my father that I once had corrected him during the lessons. It annoyed him, so he checked his books during the break to discover I was right. He was not the only one. A geography teacher admitted I knew more than he did about Russia.

On the final exams, my average grade was the highest (8.6 out of 10). The scores were good but not outstanding and resulted from hard work. Some pupils had stellar degrees in mathematics without working hard, but not me. My average was good but not stellar. If I didn’t prepare for a test, which happened once, my grade dropped dramatically to 3.5. And so, the mathematics teacher, Mr. Blaak, had a field day and made jokes about me spending too much time on the school newspaper. And I never solved the Rubik’s cube, despite spending much time on it. It demonstrates I was not a genius.

My weak spot was explaining literature. It is about guessing the supposed motives of book authors. My scores were consistently poor, the poorest of the class. I considered guessing other people’s motives and decoding hidden messages in texts a waste of time. The authors themselves often marvelled at what the literature experts found out about their intentions from the books they had written. Art and literature were a lot of fluff about feelings, quite often imagined. And I did poorly at it, and it probably has to do with my Asperger’s Syndrome. With the final exams nearing, I began to fret and asked my teacher, Mr. Amelink, to give me additional practice exams. A teacher could only dream of such a fanatic pupil, so he was helpful, but the grades remained as poor as before.

Before the final exam, I prayed that the grade wouldn’t be too bad. Not only to my surprise, my result was the best of everyone, only equalled by Geraldine, a girl with a striking hairdo, a bit alternative, who dressed outspokenly and flaunted her interest in art and literature. Mr. Amelink was also amazed and suggested the extra lessons had made a difference. Another girl became curious about this feat. She said, ‘You have a mysterious way of winning in the end.’ I was too embarrassed to tell about the prayer. It was selfish to pray for a higher grade. People in Africa needed God’s help much more. And it could not be that God granted that wish, or could it? While doing the test, the questions appeared more concrete than usual, making it easier to answer them.

There is a subtle difference between speculating about hidden motives and understanding the meaning of texts. I was good at the latter. It inflated my grades, as explaining texts comprised 50% of the scores in English and French. If a particular English or French word was unfamiliar to me, I could still infer its meaning from the subject of the text, the author’s opinions and the purpose of the paragraph or sentence. By connecting the dots, you often arrive at the correct answers. I hardly made errors in these questions.

At the time, there was no reason to suspect God had anything to do with it. Still, later developments added a peculiar twist to this incident, as I may have uncovered messages from God in pop music lyrics. The teacher’s name, Amelink, suggests a possible link to the isle of Ameland, and Ameland was to become part of a set of peculiar coincidences. A song named The Foundling of Ameland refers to this island. It includes a scene with the foundling walking over the water. But that was still over twenty years into the future. And I disappointed my economics teacher. Had my grade for economics been slightly higher, I would have received a 10, and an economist would have come to the school to give me the diploma. My teacher had hoped for that.

Perhaps You Can See the Irony of It

On a road to nowhere

After the terrorist attacks of 11 September 2001, a populist politician, Pim Fortuyn, gained popularity because traditional politicians had failed to address the growing unease of the Dutch about Muslim immigrants. Fortuyn promoted a messianic personality cult. He called himself the Son of the People of the Netherlands. About the leader the Netherlands needed, Fortuyn wrote in his book De Verweesde Samenleving (The Orphaned Society), ‘A leader of stature is Father and Mother in one. He dictates the law and oversees the herd’s cohesion. The skilful leader is the Biblical Good Shepherd.’ Fortuyn anticipated the coming of the Great Leader of the Netherlands as he wrote, ‘Towards a Father and a Mother, on the way to the Promised Land,’ and, ‘Let us prepare for his arrival so that we can receive him.’ He posed himself as the Messiah. It was one of the reasons I didn’t like him. Perhaps you can see the irony of that.

Fortuyn called Islam a backward religion and claimed that Western civilisation was superior. He valued the achievements of Western civilisation, such as the separation of church and state, LGBTQ rights and freedom of opinion. Many Muslims hold on to a medieval worldview. Still, Islam opposes interest charges on money and debts, and I believed that interest was one of the gravest threats to civilisation, so my views of Islam were more favourable. We could learn something from Islam. Even more so, out-of-control technology might end human civilisation, either through an apocalyptic event or by altering humans to the point that they cease to exist. You can’t blame Islam for that. It is Western civilisation that has brought us to the brink. And if you can only choose between doom and women wearing body covering garments and honour killings, the choice is not that difficult, for a rational individual at least. We are on a road to nowhere,

We’re on a road to nowhere
Come on inside
Taking that ride to nowhere
We’ll take that ride
I’m feeling okay this morning
And you know
We’re on the road to paradise
Here we go, here we go

Talking Heads, Road To Nowhere

The song says that the road to nowhere is to paradise. That is the duplicity of it. Everywhere Fortuyn went, there was chaos and conflict. He seemed to enjoy it. Establishment politicians didn’t like him because they feared he would undermine society. The Netherlands has had a consensus-building tradition known as the Polder model for over a century. Fortuyn broke with that tradition.

False Messiah

Fortuyn saw himself as the coming Great Leader of the Netherlands. History took an unexpected turn. On 6 May 2002, a left-wing loner assassinated him, an event that shocked the Netherlands. ‘The bullet came from the left,’ Fortuyn’s supporters claimed. Exactly 911 days later, an Islamic fanatic murdered the Dutch filmmaker Theo van Gogh. Fortuyn’s sudden popularity was closely linked to 9/11, while Theo van Gogh had just finished 06/05, a motion picture about the assassination of Fortuyn. Van Gogh was killed on 2 November 2004 (11/2 in American notation), while 112 is the European emergency services telephone number. That points to the hand of God. The Bible has warned us of false messiahs like Fortuyn. I hope you can see the irony of that as well.

Jan-Peter Balkenende
Jan-Peter Balkenende

Fortuyn aspired to become Prime Minister. Instead, Jan-Peter Balkenende got that job. He looked like an apprentice from the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Harry Potter became his nickname. And that was not a coincidence, as the Netherlands was in for a massive bout of magic. Captain Decker, a song by Boudewijn de Groot, has the following lines,

Captain Decker, Flying Dutchman,
climbs above the timeless
space machine you’re living in,
starts to turn you inside out,
he needs you to know
what he was really all about

Captain Decker, Boudewijn de Groot

The timeless space machine could refer to the place where God is living. A Dutchman may need God to know what he is about. The animated picture Kroamschudd’n in Mariaparochie by Herman Finkers explores the possibility of Christ being born in Twente. My birthplace is Eibergen, just over the border in Achterhoek. In the 1980s, there were plans to create an independent province of Twente. It was to include Eibergen and Nijverdal. Finkers came from Almelo, like Ilse DeLange. DeLange’s fourth studio album, The Great Escape, plays a central role in God’s messages in pop music.

World peace

In December 2008, there were many strange incidents. One of them was that the candy vending machine at the office delivered a particular message. Often, I went there to fetch a Twix bar. This time, the machine malfunctioned and failed to produce a Twix. It repeatedly misfired. That had never happened before, and to my knowledge, no one else had trouble with the machine that day. After trying three different options, it finally worked when I chose option 22: a Nuts bar. That was nuts, even more so because 22 = 11 + 11.

It was about to get even nuttier. To me, 11:11 represents a strange coincidence with two parts. The next day, I bought a bag of potato crisps from the same machine. This time, it worked fine, but after opening the bag, I found a small piece of paper with the crisps. It was a temporary tattoo with the following Chinese text:

世界和平

One of my colleagues knew a Chinese man who translated it for me. The characters stand for world peace. No one else got a temporary tattoo with a bag of crisps. It was a production glitch. The paper had slipped into the bag, perhaps from another product line, and it ended up in my hands. Remarkably, my colleague Ronald Oorlog was absent that day. He had fallen ill. His last name, Oorlog, is the Dutch word for war. Now, that is a funny coincidence. Another colleague, Rene H, joked about the text, saying, ‘World peace is what Miss World would say she wanted after winning the prize.’

Linking it to Sneek

A nursing home in Sneek is named Nij Nazareth (New Nazareth). The nickname is The Banana because the building is banana-shaped. A former neighbour of Allard and Geke, nicknamed The Hedgehog because of his hairdo, has taken residence there. If the name New Nazareth means anything, it could mean that the Second Coming comes from this particular town, which was, by some miraculous accident, my town of residence. It could be that there were other places and buildings with the same name. And so, I used a search engine to look for them, but nothing else came up. Perhaps I was making too much of this coincidence. In the song Het Sneker Café, the unrivalled poet of the Dutch language, Drs. P mocks the making of outlandish connections to a pub in Sneek,

There once was a girl of seventeen years of age,
the only child of a wine merchant,
who sought shelter in the Jura,
because she was lost on a trip.
She found an unoccupied house at the edge of the forest,
and felt from the outset that this is not right.
She took a glance at the window and what appeared:
Inside was the skeleton of a salesman in toiletries,
who had been missing for years
and had once stayed with his uncle and aunt in Bordeaux when he was young.
And there, they had almost exactly the same type of lampshades
as a small pub in Sneek.

Drs. P, Sneker café

There is a nursing home in Sneek named Nij Nazareth (New Nazareth). Its nickname is The Banana because the building is banana-shaped. A former neighbour of Allard and Geke, nicknamed The Hedgehog because of his hairdo, has taken residence there. If the name New Nazareth means anything, it could mean that the Second Coming comes from this particular town, which happens to be my town of residence, perhaps for the same reason that the building is there. To rule out the possibility that there were other places or buildings with the same name, I used a search engine, but nothing else came up, which made it more noteworthy, though perhaps I was making too much of this coincidence. In the song Het Sneker Café, the unrivalled poet of the Dutch language, Drs P, mocks the making of outlandish connections to a pub in Sneek,

You see now how the pub again and again
affects the social interaction.
How here and there, and yes, even overseas
one stumbles upon this pub from Sneek.
It’s inexplicable and almost occult,
something that fills the world with trepidation.

Drs. P, Sneker café

As a prophecy, it is slightly off the mark by focusing on a pub, of which Drs P did not disclose the name, so that it remains a subject of speculation, and not on Sneek itself. Prophesies somehow tend to be off. That seems to come with predestination. If we knew our predestined future, it wouldn’t materialise. Yet there are inexplicable, occult connections that fill the world with trepidation. And that nursing home, New Nazareth, is not the only thing that justifies the trepidation. You pronounce Sneek like ‘snake,’ and there was allegedly a serpent in Paradise. In scripted reality, there is no coincidence, so we can safely argue that there might be more to it.

Pope end times prophecy

In January 2013, an Australian poster on the message board Godlikeproductions.com started a thread titled ‘112 Keeps Coming Up In The Media.’ Others joined in with their own selective biases and found many 112s popping up in the media. That same number is the European Emergency Services telephone number, and since I had lived in room 112 in that fateful dormitory, the thread caught my attention. The discussion remained active for several weeks. During that time, Pope Benedict XVI resigned on 11 February 2013, a highly unusual move. He was the first pope to step down in almost 600 years.

That became material for this thread. 11 February is also the 112 European Day, which celebrates the emergency services telephone number. 11 February is 11/2 in European notation, and 112 is the European emergency services telephone number, so that is why. You must admit the European bureaucrats have found a most peculiar occasion to throw a party. In any case, the Pope’s resignation came unexpectedly, like a bolt from the blue. And lightning struck the Vatican a few hours after the Pope had resigned.1 It made several people wonder, so the thread came back alive.

Pope Benedict XVI’s resignation on European 112 Day is also noteworthy because of the 112th Pope End Times Prophecy attributed to Saint Malachy. The prophecy alleges 112 popes would reign, starting with Celestine II, until the End of Times. Benedict XVI was the 111th Pope. His resignation prepared the way for the 112th Pope, Pope Francis, who, according to the prophecy, would become the last Pope before the End of Times and Jesus’ return. That made me curious, so I investigated the matter and discovered that Saint Malachy had died on 2 November (11/2 in American notation) 1148, and I added that noteworthy item to the thread.

The prophecy raves about the 112th Pope, ‘In the final persecution of the Holy Roman Church, there will reign Peter the Roman, who will feed his flock amid many tribulations, after which the seven-hilled city will be destroyed, and the dreadful Judge will judge the people.’ Some claim it refers to Judgement Day or the second coming of Jesus Christ. It requires quite a stretch of the imagination to make it fit Francis’s tenure, but humans are imaginative beings. Pope Francis died on Easter Monday, 21 April 2025, at the age of 88, and the 113th Pope, Leo XIV, came. My preparations weren’t yet complete, but had progressed far enough to think that the End Time could commence within a few years.

If so, that century-old prediction could be remarkably close in time, even though it doesn’t match the described events. It seems too accurate to be a coincidence, yet not entirely on the mark. The same holds for Finkers’ animated picture of Christ’s birth in Twente. My birthplace, Eibergen, is a few kilometres outside Twente. Likewise, the 9 February 2009 superstorm prediction was too accurate to be a coincidence. The date was correct, but the location was off by about 400 kilometres. Route N666 didn’t precisely end in Borssele, the location of the only remaining Dutch nuclear power plant, but in nearby Heerenhoek within the Borssele municipality. The other Dutch atomic plant, which had been closed, was in Doodewaard (Death Holm), a remarkable name. The former Doodewaard municipality had been 66.5 square kilometres in size, so close to 66.6 that it is noteworthy.


Jesus’ ministry occurred sometime between 26 and 30 AD, a period that will soon mark 2,000 years, which is worth noting. We might find out soon whether or not God finally means business this time. After 2,000 years of waiting, you wouldn’t expect that anymore, and most people live as if Judgment Day will not occur during their lifetimes. And as you might know, the hour will come as a thief in the night. The Day of the Lord will come unexpectedly, suddenly, and without warning. That is to say, if that day ever comes. Likewise, you wouldn’t expect an autistic individual like me to be the messiah. Okay, men with Asperger’s Syndrome tend to be faithful, and God might prefer a man with ‘a heart of gold’, but maybe there is more to it. So, what makes autistic people special?

Latest revision: 11 February 2026

1. Lightning strikes St Peter’s Basilica as Pope resigns. BBC (12 February 2013).

Heaths near Nijverdal

Worried Parents

The school switched to a new method called the Jena plan. There were no old-fashioned classes. Mr. B was my teacher for four years. He was a gentle person with a beard and perhaps a bit of a hippy. After all, these were the 1970s. You had some freedom. The Jena plan had task hours. Every day, you had one or two hours to perform tasks you had to finish before the end of the week. Once you had finished them, you were free to do as you please. You could read books or make drawings if you wanted.

At the start of the fourth grade, Mr. B gave everyone a weekly task schedule for the entire year. I remember finishing the whole task list for the year in three months. Mr. B then gave me my work for the fifth grade. I then slowed my pace and spent two and a half years, most of the time drawing or doing other things. At the end of the sixth grade I had finished all these tasks precisely on schedule.

The school emphasised group work. That might have been due to the Jena plan. The classes consisted of children from different levels, ranging from the first to the third or the fourth to the sixth grade. They split the class into small groups of mixed levels so we could help each other. We still had old-style classes and different teachers for some fields, such as calculus or geography. Mr. B took personal development, expression, social skills and teamwork seriously. He probably found them more important than learning. And so he reported to my parents that I did well on my school tasks but was a strange kid who didn’t connect with other children, often went out alone during playtime, and acted oddly.

My parents became worried. My mother then forced me to join the Boy Scouts to play with other children and work in groups. Perhaps a psychologist had given my parents this advice. A young woman led the group. In the narrative of the Boy Scouts, she was our mother. She supposedly was a wolf, and we were her pups. We had a yell, ‘Akela, we do our best, and you do the rest.’ I endured being a Boy Scout for over a year while trying to find an excuse to quit.

Then came the epic winter of 1979, with snow storms and temperatures reaching minus twenty degrees Celsius. The bad weather started just after Christmas. On one of the last days of 1978, we split into two groups and went outside. One group supposedly was lost in the forest while the other group came to the rescue. We were the lost group. It took the other group a long time to find us. By then, it seemed we indeed needed rescuing. But no one was injured, so it wasn’t that serious.

After this chilly adventure, I refused to go there again. My mother then made me choose a sport. I wasn’t good at sports and didn’t like them. My father later recalled that I once wrote a hilarious essay about sports being a waste of time and energy. I selected judo because my friends Marc and Hugo did it, too. Judo is about harnessing your opponent’s force to your advantage. Again, I schemed to get out and succeeded after over a year.

My parents sent me to Almelo for psychological evaluation. I went there by bus every week and stayed for hours. Psychologists questioned me and watched me play with other children. I didn’t trust them and didn’t tell them about my thoughts and feelings. After accidentally saying I loved to dream, the psychologist asked me to elaborate. I cut off the conversation and tried to do and say what they expected of a normal child. And I took the hint. In later school reports, Mr. B noted I socialised more and played like an ordinary kid. He also mentioned I had a vivid imagination and appreciated my writing skills.

The report further noted that my desk drawer was a mess. Mr. B then made me responsible for keeping the materials closet in order. But I am very organised, not in irrelevant detail, but in essential matters. My files are currently neatly organised, but the room is not tidy. The drawer needed no organisation. It was easy to find what you needed. The materials cabinet had drawers for various parts, which was a file-type organisation, so I could indulge in organising it, which I did with fervour, much to the delight of Mr B, who believed he had taught me something.

Featured image: Heaths near Nijverdal. Jürgen Eissink (2018). Wikimedia Commons. Public Domain.

Close up of chestnut tree branch at De Famberhorst in the Netherlands

The Tree Garden

Once I went to bed in the evenings and sometimes during the day, my imagination took over, most notably when sitting on the swing in the back garden. There were several different fantasies, often recurring. In one, I drove a car on a road called De Weg (The Way), reflecting my life path. There is a parallel with the Chinese Tao. And our home had wings and could fly, but only in my imagination. Once, in a dream, all the houses in Nijverdal spread their wings, went up in the air, and installed themselves in new locations during school time, so I got lost on my way home. That gave me the idea.

A few times, I had a crush on a girl. And out of nowhere came a strange and scary imagination. She would consume me or digest me inside her stomach. The inside of her stomach consisted of giant gears that crushed me. That imagination didn’t relate to my feelings for these girls, which weren’t particularly strong, or a fear for them as they weren’t particularly intimidating. It just seemed to come out of the blue. In hindsight, it was a foreboding of things to come three decades down the line.

In the autumn of 1976, I had gathered a bag of chestnuts and left them on the ground behind the shed in the backyard. The following spring, dozens of small chestnut trees popped up on the spot. It was the start of my tree garden in the backyard land and the germinate club that specialised in growing trees, most notably chestnut trees. The backyard land belonged to our neighbour, Mrs. Schaap (Mrs. Sheep). She came from the Dutch Indies and was in her sixties when we moved there. She was a widow. Her husband had died a few years earlier, and the patch would become a kitchen garden tilled by her husband. And so, that land remained fallow, and I could begin a tree garden there.

Mrs. Schaap didn’t mind, and we could get along. I was often on her terrace, drinking lemonade with her. She also drank nettle tea, ate nettle soup against her rheumatism, and let me taste them. They were not a thrilling taste sensation. They were like green tea. Ms Schaap became very old and died in 2014, aged 100. On the other side was a garden centre owned by the Ter Horst couple. The wife often came over to let my mother do her hair. To me, the garden centre was an adventure centre. I could hide between the bushes and trees and move inconspicuously. I saved trees and plants from the garbage heap, sometimes with friends, to relocate them in the tree garden. Once, I sold a plant to Ms Schaap, but my mother cancelled the sale.

For over a decade, Mrs. Schaap had a fancy man, Mr. Langelaar. His wife had dementia and later died. He often came over, and they sat in the garden reading books. Ms Schaap sometimes came to buy a few cigarettes from my mother. She didn’t want to keep them at home as that would make her smoke more. I vaguely remember Ms Schaap having a fish tank in the living room at first. My father later confirmed it. That is noteworthy, as at our previous address in Eibergen, our next-door neighbour was also a lady of the same age from the Dutch Indies with a fish tank. I regularly visited the other neighbours as well. They were mostly older people who had kitchen gardens, chickens, cows and rabbits.

We had a horse, first a pony named Tilly, and later, a real horse, Desi, for my mother to ride. A horse in your pasture attracted girls who wanted to ride it. My mother only allowed Alexandra to do that. She had long, curly blond hair and was beautiful, but she was six years older, so I barely looked at her. As the story goes, she had been on holiday with her parents in Morocco once, where a wealthy man offered her parents 3,000 camels to marry her. My mother sold the horse in the early 1980s when interest rates skyrocketed, and mortgage payments became a drag on the budget.

Trees became special to me. I made drawings of trees and made up stories about them in which they could talk and fly. And I began drawing maps, first of the Netherlands and later of Europe or imaginary countries with coastlines, villages, cities, roads, and rivers. These imaginations made life more agreeable. In bed, a fairy tale world took over. This situation remained so during my teenage years and didn’t change during adulthood. There was a strict disjunction between reality and imagination. I was imaginative but didn’t believe my imagination. That was unusual. Most people are less imaginative but believe in their fantasies.

I still love trees. After buying my house, I left the garden and the trees the way they were, much to the chagrin of my neighbour, a lawyer who wanted them cut down. And I planted Christmas trees next to the railroad near my home. One survived and has grown large. In the early 2000s, a deadly chestnut disease began to kill chestnut trees. They suffered the same fate as the elms culled by the Dutch Elm Disease. That is peculiar, as I was born on Elm Street in the Netherlands and had grown chestnut trees later on. The fact that the elm disease is Dutch adds some juice to this coincidence.

In school, a book once presented the children with a choice about the type of future they preferred. Option one was a sober room with a light bulb. A boy on a wooden stool asked his parents, ‘When will there be electricity so I can read?’ This option represented a simple life with little comfort. Option two was a boy attached to a machine. He didn’t appear all that healthy. It represented an advanced technological society. I chose the first option.

Feature image: Close-up of a chestnut tree branch at De Famberhorst in the Netherlands. Dominicus Johannes Bergsma (2016). Wikimedia Commons.